Goals, Resolutions, Blah, Blah, Blah

I kid, of course. Anyone who knows me well knows I am a planner. I make lists, I schedule in advance, I like to know what is happening. So every year, I put together a quick list of yearly goals - and 2007 is no exception. Given this post about January New Year's Resolutions comes midway through the month, however, does not bode well for my ability to stay on top of things this year. Sigh...

This year, I decided to join forces with my dear friend (and extraordinary writer) Carrie. I'd give a link to her blog, but one of her resolutions for 2007 is to actually start one. I can't find the words to express how talented this woman is. She's a prolific writer, savvy advertising executive, and creative as all get out. One of the things we have in common is a swirl of creative ideas, projects, and desires that consumes us on a daily basis - and that often becomes an enemy when it surrounds you to the point of paralysis. Too many ideas, so you do nothing. Typical story.

Anyhoo, this year I thought we could help each other. You know, save the money on a coach or a therapist and hold each other accountable to getting some things "done" this year. So I shared with her my template for yearly goals: I basically segment out the things I know I want to accomplish by topic (writing, travel, finances, fitness) and give myself ACTIONABLE items to tick off the list as the year goes by. Given my crazy schedule, constant projects, and insane desire to squeeze everything out of life that I can, this tool has served me well to realize that I can't do it all, so I should focus on a few highlights.

As the aforementioned planner, I am usually totally down with this goal-setting exercise. I don't even care if I don't achieve all my goals that year; the list keeps me honest and when I do check something off, I feel accomplished. But this year I was sort of dragging my heels about my list. I had some definite ideas and goals, but could not figure out what was keeping me from committing to them. So, as I do often, I hemmed and hawed about the topic via email to my Carrie. Carrie is like a living diary, a book I can pour all my thoughts into and who actually responds with insights and questions. It's fabulous and I highly recommend getting your own.

It came down to this: This is a transition year for me. I have quite a few goals that I could just move forward and tackle, but there are also some decisions (not up to me) which affect them. I am investing energy in some things that I have to let come to fruition before my time is truly my own. I really want to enroll in the A.C.T. Summer Conservatory for example, but right now I am invested in the short term to something that, if I just give it one more year, could basically set me up for more long-term freedom to do what I want to do next year. I was beating myself up that I was using these "factors not under my control" as an excuse, but really, I'm just making an investment for the short-term. And I am okay with that. Sometimes, you have to wait it out to get to what you really want. And as long as you're waiting as part of your master plan and not due to fear, insecurity or a flock of other negative obstacles, you just need to hold onto your vision and enjoy the ride.

And what is my ride? Maintaining my blog, writing more articles for SF Downtown (and hopefully some new pubs, too), saving up for a house down payment, getting my exercise routine back on track, traveling, taking a Shakespeare class, doing some more plays, and generally eating, drinking, and enjoying family and friends. Don't kid yourself: Miss "I'll die if I get anything less than an A" has to be graded and measured. So my Goals list still has some concrete action items on it. But they are a lot more fluid and realistic for where I need to be this year, in order to be where I want to be next year, and the year after that, and the year after that.

And that, my friends, is what resolutions should really be all about. The story doesn't end on December 31, 2007 - it's a marathon, not a sprint, as they say and it's the total journey that counts.