Golden Globes Loses It's Shine

At least for me, it has.

Sunday's Golden Globe awards show was the typical spectacle of glamour, ego and frivolity I come to expect from any beloved award show. I have a relationship with these shows that mimics a bad boy love affair: I know it's bad for me, but I make excuses saying that he's really an artist at heart- and no matter how pompous he acts, I just can't stay away.

Let's start with host Ricky Gervais. Who I adore. Really. But he's getting slammed for his skewering of Hollywood and perhaps going a bit too far. Watching him the other night, my stomach was in delicious knots, just dreading his next comment but sort of wanting to see the train wreck at the same time. Does he call it like it is? Absolutely. Yes, the SATC women are middle-aged; yes, Mel Gibson went on a drunk anti-semitic tirade; Robert Downey Jr. abused drugs. But here's my issue: that type of unexpected snarkiness is funny only when it's precisely that: unexpected. When you purposely hire a host and promote the show as "Tune in: we don't know what will happen!" then you are calculatingly trying to be snarky and funny. Which is fake. It doesn't work. His past performances were so great in that they really were unexpected surprises. When you try to bottle spontaneity and shock, well, you get left with angry people and a so-so performance. What the heck did the HFPA expect?

Second, the awards. Sounds like I must see The Social Network, which will absolutely not be a hard sell for me since I (heart) Aaron Sorkin. I already watch Glee but even though this past season was not as good at the first and I feel they have gone off the rails a bit, I still enjoy it. I also must see The King's Speech and Black Swan. So excited that two of my favorite actors, Colin Firth and Natalie Portman, were honored as well. I'm a little over everyone fawning over Chris Colfer on Glee just because he plays "the gay kid" (his performance on the episode where he came out to his dad was amazing, but I'm tired of the Kurt lovefest every week). However, it is always nice to see a relative unknown realize a dream like winning such an award so good for him. Hurrah for Jane Lynch on Glee wining Best Supporting Actress - she makes that show and her character is so deliciously complex. Jim Parsons from Big Bang Theory is a genius. Love that he won. Have never seen The Big C but love Laura Linney, so hurrah for her. And never had any desire to watch Sons of Anarchy, but apparently Katey Segal won for that. Finally, I about bawled at the end of Toy Story 3 (from the kid who used to name all of her stuffed animals and even taped countless"interviews" with them for an exclusive variety show audience consisting of my family) so I was thrilled it won best animated film.

Third, the speeches. I love finding the eloquent gem in the sea of crap where winners feign humility and shock and then merely spout a list of names of people I don't know. But I came up empty this year. Even Robert DeNiro's funny lines for his Cecil B. Demille award were written for him, it seemed, and so obviously read off of the teleprompter. And Natalie Portman, one of my fave actresses because she's also so brilliantly intelligent, let me down with her rambling speech. The only standout parts for me was 1) when Ricky jokingly blasted Steve Carell for leaving The Office and "sacrificing their cash cow" - and Carell comes out on stage, pushing Ricky out of the way in mock disdain; and 2) when Michael Douglas, recently fighting a battle with throat cancer, came out on stage to an endless round of applause and quipped, "Thanks, but there's got to be an easier way to get a standing ovation!" That was classy. Overall, though this year's lines were kind of "meh."

Fourth, the fashion. OK, this is really the realm of my expert friend Melanie (who has yet to cover it on her blog yet). Some stunners included Natalie Portman (I don't agree with the critics - I thought she looked great in that pale pink number with the rose - very elegant), JLo (again, disagree with the critics), Claire Danes, Scarlett (hair-do aside), Anne, and - I'm sorry, but it's really hard for Angelina Jolie to look bad in anything.

But what was the bondage number that January Jones had going on? That much beauty should not be packaged in something so dreadful. Heidi Klum: What's with the circus tents draped all over you? You are so better than that, my dear. And the amazing Helena Bonham Carter continues to not give a shite about what people think, which I kind of dig about her. But Harry Potter's wardrobe department called and they want the Beatrix LeStrange costume back. Why, oh why, does she insist on that Bride of Frankenstein hair at every event she attends? She is so beautiful. Maybe she's trying to make a point. I didn't understand Julianne Moore's arm sling, and Olivia Wilde's gown was a bit too Disney for me.

So another year, another Golden Globes show. It'll be a challenge for the producers to figure out how to give the show more punch and increase viewership, as rating were a bit flat this year. Glad that's not my job....I can just sit here and snarkily critique it!