7.28.2006

Why I'm in love with "Big Love"

OK, I admit it. At first, I thought, "Ewwww! Who would want to watch a show about a guy with 3 wives, using them as sex slaves while he actually gets to go out and contribute to society?" And Bill Paxton talking not one, not two, but THREE women into marrying him? Please....

But I was surprised by HBO's "Big Love" in a big way. And I'm totally hooked on a show that redefines family and is filled with more juicy neighborhood secrets and gossip than "Desperate Housewives".

The only things I knew about Mormons were that they mostly live in Utah, they are big on geneology (the LDS Church's extensive work with tracing family histories has in fact led to Utah having one of the largest wired and internet user populations than any state in the US) and that they believe in polygamy - or at least some of them do. This is only the tip of the iceberg, kids.

From "Big Love" I got hip to the fact that there are various factions of the Mormon religion. Some die hard fundamentalists who still believe in "plural marriage" or the Principle as it's called, and live in compounds; More modern Mormons that embrace the fundamental religious teachings yet function in everyday Western society, complete with only one committed marriage; And some folks caught in the middle: trying to live in the mainstream American society, yet still believing that polygamy is a divine gift and have created a plural marriage of respect and - I know this sounds crazy - sisterly love among the wives.

I am so intrigued by this whole thing from a sociological standpoint, I bought Jon Krakauer's "Under the Banner of Heaven" which explored the Mormon and Mormon fundamentalist movements. I can definitely see where some of the "Big Love" writers got their source content in the real-life characters and names of modern Mormonism. The book is riveting if you get a chance to pick it up but is also not very well-received (according to the author) by the Mormon community.

Anyway, this blog entry is not a historical critique on Mormonism. I just love this show. The interplay of the characters is amazing. First of all, it's definitely not all fun and games. Real marriage, with all it's bickering, sacrifices, and time committments, is only magnified by the plural marriage thing. I mean, it's hard enough having one relationship to deal with, including personal preferences, mood swings, schedules, in-laws and what not - imagine having to deal with three?! That's just downright exhausting.

But the love and affection they all have for each other, their kids, their home - and especially the love/hate bond between the wives - is amazing. In fact, it is quite selfless. Too selfless for my own personal taste, as there is a lot more the women give up than their husband. But the fact that the kids have 3 mother figures they can turn to is quite touching.

Now, the show does not sugar coat the whole idea and does indeed show the dark side of all this, especially with the families still living fundamentalist values on the compound. There's a lot of backstabbing, plotting, and treachery going on with these characters. But overall, "Big Love" just makes me stop and think - especially when I had such strong opinions before and then find myself cheering for the Hendrixson's (the Paxton clan). It's quite disconcerting - and fascinating at the same time.

1 comment:

Sarah Granger said...

Interesting. I'll have to check it out. Doesn't sound like the Mormons I knew growing-up (who prefer, incidentally, to be referred to as members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, or LDS members). They were pretty typical church-goers, whose main issues were staying off caffeine and paying tything on time so they could get into the temple.